Who am I, you ask, and why am I here? Or should I say, you would ask if you were able to get a word in edgewise, which you won't be. Except 'tulgey'. Yes, you could probably slip the word 'tulgey' in edgewise. I'm particularly fond of the word 'tulgey'. And hats. Excellent word for describing woods, you know, 'tulgey'. I also knew what 'vorpal' meant before it was popular. And wore hats when they weren't.

Anyway, first questions first, and in that order for once. Who am I? Well, that's a somewhat ridiculous question, I must say. Who do you think I am? Certainly you could call me Xanfor, and in fact I'm sure a lot of you will. But all that would be is a name. Despite what your doctor may tell you, giving Something a name does not tell you any more about the Thing. Shakespeare once said a few words to that effect, I believe. Personally, I have no problem with bestowing names. I've no problem with making new words at all, to tell the truth. Nothing wrong with trying to be precise. I do believe I mentioned 'tulgey'? Pure imagination, genius!

So let's take a look at what composes this thing you've named. 'Xanfor', it's called. Well, what can you see of Xanfor? The absolute truth is that you see nothing but words and images. That's all you know. That all you can know. This text you're reading is Xanfor. Those pixilated atrocities to the left of this entry are Xanfor. That character in the red hat on a certain other forum is Xanfor. But Xanfor itself is no more than an avatar, a cyberspace personality revealed only by what you see digitally conveyed to your screens.

I wish I could assure you as to who I am. I wish I could inform you more about the true being behind the keyboard. But alas, you cannot even be sure that there is a keyboard! All you have is my, ergo Xanfor's, assurances. And given the virtuality of our correspondence, you have no way of verifying the validity of any of my personal statements. I could never convince you of the truth, no matter what that truth may be. I may actually be an infiltrating spy for a planet outside this solar system. I may actually be an embodiment of the Internet's sentience. I may actually be a political renegade curled up hiding inside an attic somewhere on St George's Island. Can I prove any of it? Can I deny any of it?

What you have been reading was written in the form of personality named 'Xanfor'. And unfortunately, that is all I can credibly tell you.

As for why I'm here, that's easier to answer. Everyone was doing it, I just wanted to be popular.